JA, EIN URUPEEN NITE CLUBB WIT THOSE SCHMUTZIG FRAUS

The following recording was from someone's (name unmentioned to protect his family) podcast as of September the 31st:

"So sup dawgs, i am the ninja chicken friday potatoes hair skin sup sup chicken salad whut bad boy. 

OH MY GOD ZACK EFRON IS HERE. WITH A FLICKING KNIFE. GOD DO YOU KNOW WHAT KNIVES DO? 

They CUT PEOPLE. And then they BLEEEEEED to DEATH. 

OH MY GO-"
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Millions of people are killed daily by Zac Efron. This may be because he's secretly that guy from "Death Note," a japanese comic book about a very pretty boy who kills people. That explanation may just be total bullpie, however. Zack Effon knows where you sleep. Even if he doesn't kill you, he's still watching your every move. Every move you make, every breath you take, every heart you break, he'll be watching you. No, it's not because he secretly loves you. It's so that he can learn enough about your weak points to manipulate YOU into killing people FOR him.